videogames has taken over my life.

everything that i was supposed to be productive that i planned long before has suddenly put into a stop. well i guess its okay. i really like playing videogames as much as people think that i should do some other thing appropriate for my age. ha! i dont care. at least im not into any vices.

the days of insomnia has taken its sweet revenge on me. as much as i want to sleep early, i just couldnt and im afraid that its taking its toll on my body. maybe im just paranoid but some things happened which left me shaken just a little bit.

my mom is going to leave again but this time just for a week.

this summer is pretty weird. i didnt really had a chance to leave this house or at least the boundaries of trinoma/sm. i want to leave and go to justine's house or go to greenhills for fun or even galle. the only gimik that i had went down the drain but its how things happen and i cant just go ruin their happiness over my own misfortune heheheheeh exagge e hahhahaha. ok lang me susunod pa naman e :D

still cant get over some things. i just think that everything is happening so fast and when i look back im just weirded out that things turned out like this. masama ba? i dont know if my reasons are justifiable but some things are supposed to be let go. things wont fix itself that easily unless someone takes matters into their own hands. well, thats life.

rivalry? hahahaah minsan natatanga nalang ako sa mga naiisip ko e.


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inaction

brooding is BAD.

so why is it i cant let go of certain things? sometimes saying things face to face can bring more hurt rather than closure.

i getting sick and tired of repeating things over and over again and i feel like a broken record. maybe i should just forget about it and go on with my life. sooner or later things will resurface. there is a time for everything.

i just dont want to trouble my friends with all the whining. life is like that it can never totally be the way you want things to be.

as much as so many things scare me, i certainly feel powerless over some of it. i just hope for the best even if some things screw me over.

last sunday, me and my sister got "kidnapped" by our relatives. we werent really that happy about it since sunday is like the sacred day of family fun even if it means that its just me and my sister. thats the reason behind my cwts prostests because there were many many sundays that got used for some unreasonable things. still, we got informed pretty late. late meaning the day itself which sometimes can make you feel useless since you have to rearrange your already-planned-out day. being informed that late you wouldnt really know what to think. we had to deal with things since sunday also equates to lots of sleep. i was just worrying about my sister since she has classes the next day and they werent really paying attention to that fact. it did drag on and eventually we got home late. its not that i dont like my relatives or anything like that. its just we werent really given any choice since our tita was going to pick us up at home and i again let me stress the fact that we were informed at the day itself. sometimes it gets weird but we just deal with this things because it does happen a lot.

yeah, i think i have a lot of things to deal with but im not making it into such a big problem. well, at least some of it.

i've been sleeping in the afternoons for the past few days. yeah im getting back the lost zzzzs that from the previous weeks of insomnia.

i miss my mom! hahahahahah


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maybe ill got one of my friends place when things are a little bit settled
(^__________^)v

not everything is picture perfect.

we all had our ups and downs in life and i believe all this things happen for a reason. we all had our fair share of mistakes and no matter how devastating the present is, in the long run its not really so bad.

im not ashamed of things that happened in the past and im still in the process of accepting things. its just that i want to come clean with everything about me. not that im going to say some things in this blog but i believe most of my friends know some dirt about me and frankly its okay. its already part of who i am and i accept the fact that i make mistakes and i know i will make some more... (which i hope doesnt happen frequently) but the thing is - there is nothing to be ashamed of. there are different circumstances for every person existing in this world. people are subject to say many things against you and you know what? it shouldnt bother you because they dont know what they are talking about.

people are quick to judge and i feel there is no point to furthering any anxieties towards yourself. i tend to just move on and ignore all of those things.


i believe that people who suffer hardships are given a chance to grow more as a person. there is always a brightside if you just keep looking but there is catch. you just have to be responsible for the mistakes that you did.
i dont know why im yammering about this things...

the world is already full of pressure why add to it? id rather get messy rather than be the person wondering what its like on the other side.

i cant say that i have no regrets but i want to make up for it because there is still time.

i am pretty annoying these days since i kept yammering about all the things that i've kept inside me when the second sem started. its actually funny since i think its long overdue. i guess there will be a time when i can say what i have inside openly but right now im in the process of getting over some things. maybe there are some things that i have to live with. im not really sure... hahahahahah i hope dont annoy people that i talk to because it seems never ending but i guess to hell with things. ako lang nagpapahirap sa sarili ko.

i cant be concrete because i know this is temporary


nothing really happened. it just makes me think that nothing is perfect in life.

we cannot really choose to be in this life that we have now. we a born to be in this family and carry the burden that it has. even if i wished things were a little bit different it will be in vain. sometimes it sucks but i deal with it and people at home deal with it. again perspective brings to light that its not so bad.

i am not perfect and i like it that way. it means that im still human struggling to make things right.

sometimes its good to not care too much. its less troublesome :D


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eto stuck sa bahay heheheeh

headache.

after finishing the third book i was reading, i had nothing to do...again.

its either i lose my life on playing videogames or i start looking for other things to do. im planning to do some crafts but it seems finding the right fabric will be difficult and because of that i need to find another project. crap. finding materials will be a problem but ill find something. eventually hehehehe.

i realized that if i wanted to keep myself from feeling any kind of headache, i need to rest my eyes. in that case, i try to sleep it off. reading books all day and using the pc isnt really the healthiest thing to do.

i miss my mom. my sister has already invaded our room which is really okay. it just looks funny since there is a table near the bed and the laptop has been turned into an entertainment system. i still have my bedside. the only downside of her staying in the room is that the place hardly gets cleaned. somehow the room got crammed.

things are getting weird here in the house specially when most people are here at home. i guess my tito really needs someone to talk to. the problem is how to not get annoyed with him. i laugh it all off but sometimes it really gets to me. things like this will not end and im surprised how i managed to get used to these things. its really bothersome at times but i live with it everyday.


patience. i've been exercising it for a very long time without me realizing it. i guess it comes with being passive.


sana dumating din yung araw na ako naman :D
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julie wala na yun hahaha misunderstanding na rin :D
halinat magpakasaya nalang tayo.

the heat is making me irritable.

yeah, i need to do something other than go online. i've read two books already and im already at my third one. still, i want to play videogames but i have to manage my time. playing overtime can make suck out my life force and hurt my eyes.

today was clearance day. nothing much really happened.

this stillness that im in makes it more impossible for me to do things. the free time that i have is not used wisely, i think. it makes it a lot harder for me to move. i only do things out of the blue in the middle of the school year because im pressed for time. i like the challenge it brings.

im a little annoyed. oh well things dont really go the way you plan it.

the thing that i look forward to in everyday is something that i like and hate at the same time... its weird but the more that i veer away from it the more i think about things which shouldnt really be.

siguro epekto to ng c2...